JUST dating.

I am annoyed.  I am annoyed!  Last week, I was asked no less than eight times whether or not I am engaged or soon to be.  First off, I am not engaged.   Secondly, how do I know if I am soon to be engaged?  I am not the boy (big surprise).  And I will not be asking any foot-popping, down-on-one-knee dropping questions any time soon, if EVER. Helllooo...isn't the ball in his court?  And trust me, I am not expecting him to attempt to make a basket (aka: propose) any time soon.  

I don't get it!  Why do mere acquaintances feel the need to know the details of my dating life?  Why am I ring-checked when I enter a room, especially if I have my boy on my hip?  Even one of my doctor's has begun to ask me weekly whether I became engaged over the weekend.  Come on Doc, I know I have to lose a little modesty at my appointments, but that is just too personal. What could be the reasons behind all this curiosity?  

 

Are other people's lives so dull they have to live through mine?  Seriously, when choosing to live someone else's life, Moby Dick's would be more interesting than mine.   And he's a whale! Actually, I find a lot of interest in my life, but still...   Or maybe these curious Georges are bad conversationalists and don't know how else to begin a conversation?  Remember the old "how's 

the weather"  trick?  It needs to be reinstated. 

Yes, all the questions annoy me.  A lot.  However, the biggest annoyance comes after telling someone I am not engaged or planning on it.  Following my answer, I am given various responses oozing with nasty implications.  Either my boy and I must be living in sin, or we just don't love each other enough (neither of which are true--and just proves how little they know me).

Another common response is that we are out of tune with the spirit.  Once, I even received an email explaining that while my desire to date someone for a long time before taking any big steps was probably good, I needed to beware of ignoring the spirit.  In a very presumptuous way, I was told me that I should probably get married soon.  The email was received several months ago.  ha!

The last response that annoys me, is not so much a response but a lack thereof.  Actually, worse.  Sometimes, as soon as I say I'm not engaged, all of a sudden the other person's interest in me evaporates, and I am left feeling diminished to a person not worth knowing.  Most of these kinds of responses come from married folk.  True, we wouldn't be able to compare diamond carat sizes, but maybe we could have a conversation with some actual depth. What a thought! 

The facts are these: 

1. If you're gonna ring check, please do it a little more covertly.
   
2. I'm crazy in love with my boy, but that doesn't mean I have to lose control.  Love does not equal lust.
3. Treating people like they are worthless unless they are married is not only petty but can encourage feelings of failure--contributing to the BYU weirdness. 
4. Guess what.  You can be 23 and unwed.  In an environment where girls feel the need to be married before the end of their sophomore year, I'm proving my point--happily so.
5. IT IS OK TO DATE A LONG TIME.  I've heard that psychology tests show that you don't fully know someone until after 18 months anyway. 
6. No undergraduate boy can afford to marry me.  If you always thought I was low maintenance, guess again. 

I am most sensitive to number 6 on the above list.  When people start to condemn me for dating so long, I have to remember how little they know me.  How little they know about my health or the cost of my medicines.  I cannot get married until I graduate--period.  To end, I'm going to add one more item to the list.

7.  My boyfriend and I are just dating.   We are enjoying one another, spending time with each other, and getting to know each other well.   I really like him.  I love him.  But we are JUST dating.  

"Cause {even} if you like it...you {don't have to} put a ring on it."-Beyonce (edited by me)